someone get that fucking seahorse.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
