You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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