Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I've blown a few things in my day
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
