I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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