"it" just moved
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
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