im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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