Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Randomize
