so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
