just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?