Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
