Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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