it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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