so explain again why im purple
no
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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