It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
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