oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
