It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
