It's like God shit irony all over that family
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
