At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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