Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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