We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
