they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
