my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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