Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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