Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize