hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
