why didn't you poke me back
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
