Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
