I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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