btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
