Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
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Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
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