My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
