the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
