I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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