I must be too annoying 4 u.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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