I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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