Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Randomize