i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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