Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
