she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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