There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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