U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize