whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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