Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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