"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
My vagina just clenched in fear
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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