just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Randomize
