Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
