Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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