Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
