she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
