I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
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