I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize